Green taxes my hole

Am I the only one that is getting sick and tired of hearing about green issues and global warming?

It's in the paper every fucking day now, and seems to be a particular favourite hobby horse of the beard-stroking, cardigan-wearing, 'hug-a-Muslim' Guardian. I know that it is a serious problem, but what is the point in me cutting down in car usage and electricity when big business just doesn't give a bollix about what it pumps into the air?

My humble opinion: the government is gonna squeeze this green agenda thing for all it is worth, and that can only mean more taxes for the plebs. Look at it this way. The powers that be could turn round and say, 'Right Treason, me old china, we're putting your car tax up by £200 a year and we're slapping 25p on a litre of petrol.' That puts me and a lot of other people off the road. The rich, however, will just shrug their shoulders, pay the extra whack and continue to drive little Timothy 100 yards to the prep school every morning in the gas guzzling Merc. Ordinary Joe Bloggs will be priced off the roads in pretty much the same way he has been priced off the property ladder and out of third-level education.

And what will the government do with that extra money? Spend it on environmental concerns? Fucking sure they won't. It'll end up the way all taxpayers' money does - spent on keeping the lazy workshy bastards sitting on their fucking holes all day long, and paying for people to be in this country who shouldn't be here; and all the while the stupid cunts like myself who actually work for a living get screwed left, right and centre. That's why I see it as my personal, moral obligation to pay as little tax as I can possibly get away with. I get my petrol from over the border. I get my booze at knock down prices. When I smoked, I bought contraband cigs. And I have a wee sideline that brings me in a bit of cash that the taxman doesn't see.

If the government can't spend my money responsibly, then it will see less of it. Cunts.

Don't kid yourself

All over the news today: a report on discrimination in the workplace has found that women with young children fare worst of all when it comes to employment.

Not in my workplace they don't - mothers with young children milk it for all it's worth, pardon the pun. Wee Johnny only has to sneeze and they're taking five days off because 'the child's not well'. In fact, there's women in my workplace who, having managed to be absent for most of the year because of their brats, then get their promotion boards. Who are they, Paul fucking Daniels? How can you prove your suitability for work at the next grade when you're never there to do the work at your current grade? I can hear toes treading lightly among the management.

Anyway...

As far as I'm concerned, having children is a lifestyle choice. If you can't afford kids, don't have them. It's as simple as that. Hearing women complaining about work and kids is a bit like me buying a top-of-the-range Beemer and then grumbling because I can't keep up the payments. Either be a mother or an employee. Don't try and be both. I resent paying taxes to keep up other people's kids when I, as a single, childless man, get fuck all tax breaks from the government for not being a drain on the state. And before some smart arse says, 'The taxes from today's kids will pay for your pension', answer me the question why I pay national insurance contributions now if it is not going towards MY pension.