Our Oriental Friends

I like Chinese people. I like them because they're pleasant, hard-working sods who are the fourth emergency service the length and breadth of Ireland (Phone Numbers: Fire/Ambulance/Police/Local Chinkers) and despite the odd internal Triad decapitation execution job, they cause no bother. So I was pleased to see that a Chinese woman, Anna Lo, is fighting the Assembly election for the Alliance Party in South Belfast. She should take a leaf out of Gerry's book and get her supporters to vote early and vote often. Let's face it, if you were a polling station clerk would you know any different if the same Chinese people each voted two or three times in the same day? No, neither would I. Fianna Fáil will be doing it next, just you wait and see.

... and I bet you didn't know that I used to go out with a Chinese girl when I was at university? Strange but true. The relationship didn't last long though - I asked her for a 69 and she told me to cook it myself.